Letter Exchange, February 2021

Dear H,

When you told me about Refugee Tales, I was immediately engulfed with negative thoughts of what I had gone through and seen in detention because of the word ‘’Refugee’’. Little did I know that this would turn out to be a place I would call a sanctuary today. Of course this wouldn’t have been possible without your persistence on me coming for a walk with you organised by Refugee Tales every time we met to the extent that I started hiding away from you, I confess. But something very strange about your height, being soo tall, made me think that I would no longer hide from you and that I had no choice but to come with you at least once as an attempt to shut you up. When I finally came with you, It was so good that I regretted all the walks I missed. I remember in the following weeks asking you persistently for when the next walk was due.

During the walk I made friends who I now take as brothers and sisters. I learnt that People you share the same experiences will turn out to be friends forever because you can easily identify yourself with them, and likewise.

On the walk I developed true relationships with people supporting me with my struggles I faced in both detention and life outside. Sharing my experiences has helped me to understand more about myself, especially my strength which has played a big role for me to go forward in starting a new life. What doesn’t kill you, ha…

It goes without saying, I loved the food! The chef was so amazing that he didn’t only cook those yummy dishes but also brought food to our next stop wherever it was. I recall one day we were walking in a kind of a jungle but when it was approaching lunch and most of us hungry, guess what? There he was happily waiting for us. Whenever there is food, you have me. But not just food, I mean good food!

Thank you for being persistent.

 Yours,

JB

Dear JB

How could I have been so oblivious of this?!  You always seemed so well-sorted with life, I don’t think it occurred to me at any deep level that you would find the idea of joining the walk distressing.  I’m so sorry now that I wasn’t more attentive.  I remember Anna phoning me when I said I’d like to invite you to come, she wanted to know how you would manage it emotionally, and I was reassuringly confident that you’d be fine.

I remember hearing you talk a little about your experiences of detention one Easter in church, and I was so moved by what I heard then, but the ‘you’ I knew on a day-to-day basis was cheerful, at ease, always willing to try anything, usually with a guitar in hand.  Now I come to think of it, maybe I should have taken more notice when you persistently found excuses not to come on the walks. 

For me, Refugee Tales has been the source of so much life. Walking gives opportunities for conversations that would never occur in any other setting, and with Refugee Tales this also means conversations with people we would never otherwise have met, and so many fascinating people.  You and I had been walking together before, I knew you enjoyed it, so of course you’d enjoy Refugee Tales, so my not-very-sensitive thinking went. 

Well, my perception of how you were feeling was clearly far from the reality, but I’m very glad that you did overcome your misgivings and join us.  I knew that the Refugee Tales group would love you.  Thank you for taking that risky first step into the unknown with us. 

So…the reason you’re here now was motivated by trying to shut me up.  Good to know.  I’ll shut up now then, with an inward smile of joy.